We’ve all been “interviewed” countless times in some form during our lives. Whether it’s for the obvious – a new job – or any of the other times we’ve been questioned or judged by someone for the purposes of fact finding or testing suitability for a task.

Have a quick think now to all the times this has happened to you… to get you started, here’s a short list of the times I can recall from the top of my head:

• Primary School: The time I was told I could not succeed in mental arithmetic.
• Primary School: The time my parents were told that I was immature and never paid attention (I was 6 years old!).
• High School: The time when the careers adviser says I’m probably best not aiming to be an inspirational character.
• High School: The time the Year Tutor decided I was best pursuing a career in a History field.
• College: The time the year tutor urged me to go to university or I would be wasted in society.
• Jobs: The 6-7 job interviews and job applications I’ve been to.

If I followed all of the gems of advice I’ve had over the years I’d be a pretty different character. To give you an idea of how loosely their advice was followed, here’s a summary of my outcomes:

• I got a B in GCSE Maths – not bad for someone who’s told they can’t add up!
• I’m now sat here writing this article and being in ownership of FIVE companies and adviser for another three.
• I’m a motivational speaker, mental coach, and football coach… I’d say that’s pretty inspirational!
• I took Geography in school, attained an ‘A’ grade, and still take an active interest in Geography – I have no interest in traditional History subjects whatsoever, although Geology and Archaeology do interest me.
• I never went to university. I’d like to think my contribution and success is a testament to what can be achieved.
• Every job or promotion that I’ve applied for has been successful. The only jobs I’ve not “won” are the ones I’ve turned down because they didn’t suit me!

So what we can learn from this is that any advice given is not particularly good advice. In fact, most of it in my case was really ill-advised. People in influential positions can only advise you based on the half hour or so that you spend together – and let’s face it, most of the time you’re not going to open up to a person in that time frame. Is it really a surprise that they make such incorrect judgments? In fact, they’re probably making perfectly reasonable judgments based on what they’ve seen. What they see is what we choose to show them.

What does this then say about us? – We’re naturally rather defensive characters. We protect our emotions and feelings by being guarded. We keep our cards close to our chest until we feel comfortable with a person to trust them. None of these emotions and beliefs will really sit well in a situation where we’re going to be tested and scrutinised in a time-limited situation, are they?

One interviewer once told me “You’re completely new to this industry and you’re not the best candidate on paper for the job, but I like you and know that you will fit in well with the rest of the staff and will be able to learn the job”. All I did to achieve this was to follow the tips I’m about to share with you.

What can you do about it?

Be Open

You need to open up. You must “act as if” you are familiar with the interviewer to the extent of allowing them into your space and allowing them to endulge in your real self. In that short time they need to understand who you are, where you’re headed, and what motivates you. If you do not do this, you’ll give out a completely different impression of yourself, most likely either appearing extremely guarded, introvert and lacking confidence, or the mirror opposite – rather arrogant and self indulgent.

I’m sure you’ll agree that neither of these are inductive of a successful interview.

To achieve this: For a week leading up to the interview you should imagine yourself in general conversation with the interviewer. It doesn’t even matter if you’ve never seen them before. Imagine that you’ve been talking on the telephone or via email. Just imagine general flowing conversation and act as if you already have an open (yet professional) relationship with the interviewer. Whatever you do, DO NOT sit in the interview and refer to your imaginary conversations! The purpose of this exercise is to help you to become comfortable with the interviewer, not to scare them!

Be Calm

It’s crucial that you remain calm. Leading up to the interview make sure to practice sitting in silence and relaxing. It’s great to be able to focus and remain calm and comfortable in a situation where you must sit still and attentive. Read a book. Sit outside and watch a spider making a web. Go to a park and focus on leaves blowing in the breeze. Do anything that means you have to sit still and maintain discipline. You need to train yourself to be able to relax and focus on a task when everything else around us wants to get up and be active and fidgety.

Listen

Focus on what’s being asked rather than what you want to say. One of the worst things you can do is run off on a nervous or excitable tangent and neglect to answer the question being posed. The interviewer will be perpexed and wondering what you were hearing, and more destructively you’ll be smiling back at them with a satisfied look because you’re convinced you’ve just given the best answer that they’ve heard the entire day. Just keep things simple and answer the question that’s being asked.

Be Informed

If you’re going for an interview for a specific field, make sure you know about that field or industry. You’ll probably be asked questions which you can link in nicely to your knowledge of the role. Try to find out what they want in a person for the role and mentally prepare yourself to cite examples of those characteristics that you possess. It’s still crucial that you listen to the question and answer it accordingly, but if you can tie in a little piece of backup information, then go for it! Keep it short though. If they’re that interested in hearing more about it, they will be sure to ask you.

Further Reading

These tips should set you in good stead for your interview preparation. Remember that the person interviewing you is just that – a person. They cannot make good judgements or enlightened decisions unless you give them a true reflection of who you are and what you can bring to their company. They will appreciate your honesty. Every interview I’ve been to has been approached using these techniques and tips as a basis. I’ve been honest and frank about my intentions and have been awarded jobs based on my honesty and approachable nature.

To further enhance the chances of your success, Break Your Limits will be releasing additional mental conditioning techniques to help you prepare. We’ll be covering ways of putting yourself into the interviewers shoes and seeing the interview from their perspective, looking into the future and seeing where you really want to end up, and looking at ways of you imagining yourself already in that role and approaching the interview from a whole new perspective! Make sure to bookmark this page and check back for updates!

Have you ever needed to speak in front of a crowd or stand up at the front of the room to deliver a speech?  How did it make you feel?  If you were nervous leading up to it, or felt your stomach turn whilst making your way to the front of the room, then this technique is for you!

By using this technique you will be better prepared to deliver a speech, seminar, or any other public performance without experiencing the nerves and the apprehension that has previously plagued you.

By using this technique along with our Lockbox Technique, you’ll be sufficiently equipped to deal with almost any public speaking situation.

The Technique

1. I want you to relax and think back to the first time that you had to deliver a public performance and felt nervous.  For most people, this goes right back to primary education.  It might have been a “show and tell” experience, or reading a paragraph from a book in class.  Once you have the earliest reference you can find, keeping searching and thinking back further.  Does anything else spring to mind from an earlier time?  Once you’re confident that you have the earliest memory of a nervous public performance, please move on to the next step.
2. Focus on the memory that we established in step 1, and start to play it through in your mind.  Re-live that experience and notice the way in which you approached and handled the situation.  How could you have done things differently to change the experience into a pleasant one?  Consider your body language and your thought process leading up to the occasion.  Given the experience that you have at your disposal now, could you have handled the situation differently to your advantage?
3. Realise that you now have many more references and abilities in your arsenal than you did when this experience took place.  Compare yourself now to the person you were when this original event took place, and be aware of these differences, and the way in which you would handle the situation if it happened for the first time today.
4. Now cast the previous memories aside and imagine that this is the very first time that you will be delivering a public speech.  Imagine a time when you became excited about the unknown – It could be the excitement leading up to the anticipation of buying a house, a car, or visiting a new place.  Any time in the past where you were excited about something you’ve not experienced before.  Now remember how that made you feel.  It was something unknown, yet you were excited about it… so in that case why should you be nervous and anxious about something else that you’ve never experienced?  In the same way that you became excited about the “good things”, transfer this feeling of excitement into the prospect of delivering a great public speech.  Imagine yourself walking up to the front of the room with your shoulders pushed back, chest puffed out, and head held high.  Give yourself a proper smile – don’t just crunch up your mouth muscles, take it right up to your cheeks and your eyes, and even feel your forehead starting to pull.  As you approach the front of the room, see yourself up there from the eyes of a third party sat in the audience.  See how big you look?  See how confident you look and the respect you’re commanding in the room?  Everyone is there because you have something that they don’t have, and they want it.  They want to know what you know – you’ve got one up on them and they’re waiting for you to share this knowledge with them.  Now continue to play out the scene.  There’s a gently buzz of noise in the room, and then you stand up and begin to address the room. The room becomes silent as the audience listen to your every word with intrigue.  They want to know what you have to share with them, and they’re engrossed in your speech.  Notice as your words light up the room and the audience sit attentively waiting to hear more.  Play through your whole speech.  Everything is going to plan.  Everything is just right.  Now when you’ve finished your speech, see yourself wrapping it up and concluding your talk.  Notice as the room becomes alive with the buzz of a satisfied audience.  Notice their positive reaction to the end of your speech and the sight and sound of the occasion.
5. Now reflect on this event.  Did it go how you planned?  How does it make you feel about delivering the speech now?  If you’re still unsure about it, or feel that the way it plays out doesn’t suit your needs, then repeat Step 4 again, this time substituting the negative aspects of the event for elements which better suit your needs.  If you need an extra boost of confidence, now is the time to combine this method with the Lockbox Technique.
6. Now you should be raring to go and full of confidence.  Keep playing through this new imagery at least once a day, ideally twice a day until the night before you’re due to deliver the speech.  Each time you do this, create a physical cue to associate with this new feeling of confidence.  It could be pressing your finger and thumb together, tapping your hip, scrunching your toes, or any other quick and simple physical gesture to yourself.  On the day that you’re due to deliver, play it through in your mind first thing in the morning – you can do this whilst you’re in the shower or eating your breakfast – by now it’s so matter of fact that you don’t even need to concentrate on imagining it – you’ve done it so many times before.  It’s as much of a natural occurrence as sneezing, blinking, or itching your nose.
7. It’s now time to enter the scene for real!  Remember how you’ve played it through in your mind so many times, it’s become a natural event.  You’re full of confidence and you’re sure of yourself.  Your physical cue is armed and you’re ready to use it to invoke that extra boost of confidence and familiarity whenever you need it.  You know what you’re talking about and your audience and there because you have information that they want to hear.
8. You’re ready!